101 things in 1001 days

This place ain't sweet anymore.

2011-01-09T17:14:00.000-08:00

This place ain't sweet anymore.

Mooooove?

Do it like a dude.

2011-01-08T06:38:00.000-08:00

Photos from my birthday @ Nabins.

Like a virgin.

2011-01-08T01:08:00.000-08:00

My friday was awesomezzz.

No, I'm not talking about school. -.- But after school ended, I went to find Amir & Jiawen at the open house. Free popcorns! Hahaha. Bought dinner from Mr Handsome at the economic rice stall, went home.

Went out to meet W & YH at Bugis in the night. Went to Nabins, this time its a different outlet from the one I went on Guiling's & my birthday. Hmmm, the place like very cramp. Ordered 2 jugs of Heineken & grape sheesha. I tried sheesha for the first time!! YH also first time. Lol. Actually, it's not that bad as I thought. Stayed at there until 1am?? Then cabbed to Powerhouse. Ahhhh, in the end also nvr go in, cos W's safra card doesn't belong to him and he can't sign us in. Tsk, wasted. Went to Mac for supper, then cabbed home. I had fun. :D

Foolish.

2011-01-06T07:11:00.000-08:00

you come and you leave. because you know i'll always be there for you. because i'm in love with you. and i can't do anything about it.except to wait.for you to come back to me.and then leave me again.

Sometimes, the answer is just right infront of you.

2011-01-06T03:43:00.000-08:00

Photos from Marina Barage (2 January) are up on facebook. Here are some.

Kite flying with Adeline & Kendrick.Me & Kendrick tried assembling the kite.Adeline & I flying the kite. It was really windy that afternoon.

After flying the kite, we went down to wait for the rest of the cg members to arrive.Adeline!Me!

So Ethan, Gabriel & Cindy came. Played monopoly deal before heading up to fly the kite again.Haha. Gabe picking nose.Uh, self explantory. The string got tangled.Tsk. Girls.

She's just another pretty face.

2011-01-04T17:21:00.000-08:00

School is bleahxzxz. Sibei boring sia. First day of school already accounting. -.- But its okay, I got chocolate from Amir, and bubblegum from Charles. Teehee.

So, I got to know my modules for Year 2 semester 1 already. Like sian only. Can't believe I still need to do accounting for another 15 weeks in year 2. Seriously, what has accounting got to do with my course huh? Besides Management Accounting and Micro Economics, I think the rest is okay. Quite interesting.I'm hungry. :/

We were young and reckless.

2011-01-02T08:00:00.000-08:00

My busy busy Sunday. I wanted to sleep early on Saturday night because I know I had to wake up at 8am to serve for CHCC, but didn't get to sleep until 4am. So, had my 4 hours of sleep before preparing for church. I bought breakfast to eat on the way too! I seldom buy breakfast, btw. Anyway, went to serve until 1pm, before heading to airport with the rest for lunch. Ate at Crystal Jade, a bit heartpain cos all my money fly away. );

After lunch, Adeline & I went to Marina Barrage together with Ken. Went there to fly kite, met up with the rest of the cg members, played monopoly deal, yeah all that. Went home thereafter. Was dead tired. Zzzz... School tomorrow. So irritating. Tsk.

Wrong love.

2011-01-01T08:35:00.000-08:00

I was reflecting on my past relationship with Vincent. & I realised, that I had hurt such a great man because of my mistake. Our breakup was very sudden, very painful. It might seem to you people that I'm being very hypocritical here because I wrote that I cheated on him and here I am writing about this bullshit. But it hurts to let him go too, afterall, we both loved one another. I don't know what went wrong. Was it because we didn't have the right foundation from the beginning? Or perhaps the distance between us that weakened our communication and understanding for one another? Maybe it's the people around me that pulled me away from him. Or is it, as much as I don't want to admit, the feelings I had for him had faded? I remember just 2 weeks before, I'd cry if I missed a call from him. What happened between us, Bb? Despite my mother's disagreements, I still wanted to be with you. I don't care if you smoke, I don't care if you have a tattoo, I don't care if you're an ITE graduate. I still loved you. And I don't want to lose you, I don't want to let you go. But this is the right thing to do. I can't hold on to something I don't deserve. My decision to break up with Vincent was a strong, solid one. Because I did so many things to let him down, there's not one reason for me to keep him anymore. Even after our breakup, I did consider being back together with you, but I can't love you knowing that I'm just gong back to you for the wrong reasons. There might be cracks in our relationship that can be mended, but what I did, can never be fixed. What's done is done, no matter how much you forgive me, I can't erase that fact that I fell in love with another man. But still, I really want to thank him for being there for me during 2010. There are things I do which you don't like, even after voicing out your discontent, I stubbornly did things my way. I didn't change my attitude, I made you angry. But thank you for loving me all these while. I'm sorry for pushing you away, to be truthful, my heart hurts seeing you in pain, but I had to stay firm and stand on my decision to break up with you. Because I don't deserve you. Everytime we hang the phone, there were thoughts of what you would do without me, hearing you cry for me like that, but I can't go back to you, only intensified your heartache. I'm really sorry. I don't know what to do except to push you away. I feel really bad for pushing you away when you needed me the most, but I know you can be strong. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, remember this phrase? Be strong alright? I don't know who I am to you right now, maybe you don't need me anymore, maybe you've moved on. But nonetheless, I wish you will find your happiness, and a new love. One that is pure, affirmative, selfless, non-judgmental and overflowing. Find someone who will love you more than I do. I'm setting you free. You don't need to love a bitch like me. A person like me can never be deserving for your love. But for the 1 year 10 months of us being together, I have truly loved you from the bottom of my heart. And I don't regret anything, this love we once shared, I will never forget it. You were my strength, and I'm grateful for that. But I'm sorry I couldn't hold onto you, it's my loss. I really don't deserve you, you are too great for someone like me. I've made so many mistakes that seperated us, we can't be together anymore. I'm really sorry. But I just want you to know, you're not out of my heart yet, I still care for you as much as before. Seeing you like this, it pains me too, I know I'm in no position to say this, I can't stop you from clubbing or drinking, just take care of yourself okay? Don't get wasted because of this. I hope one day we will get in contact with each other. Like I said, I'm not going to leave you. I'm still here. I just can't be by your side, can't be your girl anymore. But no matter what, I won't leave you. :)

I still cry at the thought of not having you by my side.

Auld Lang Syne

2010-12-31T09:56:00.000-08:00

Just looking back at all the events that happened in 2010. A little entry to refresh how crappy my life had been.

In 2010,

I went to my grandma's sister's creamation & stood there emotionless as I watched the casket wheel into the creamatorium; while all my relatives and parents cried. For the first time, I felt like a heartless beast.

My iPhone was stolen while I was working.

I made new friends from my new school, Republic Polytechnic. Formed a clique too. Consisted of Jiawen, Sharlotte, Benjamin, Amir & me! Love them to the max.

I made my very first, male best friend, Amir. I mean, I have male friends when I was in LYSS before, just not so close to them to actually call them "best friend".

Compete in cheerleading for Asia Conference 2010. Parade Of Schools Poly-ite cluster. We lost.

Worked at Amber Lounge during F1 event. Best working experience ever.

Went drinking for the first time. That night was just the beginning of all the mistakes I was about to commit.

Started the new semester with a new class. E25L.

Cheated on Vincent. Ended my 1 year 10 months relationship with him.

Went to Universal Studios.

Became a slut.

Had my first birthday surprise at home from my clique, which now includes Ignatius, Jiawen's boyfriend.

Got my heart crushed by some jerk.

Parents got divorced. Fucking adults, I don't want to care about you people anymore.

Oh well, that sums up my 2010. Pretty crappy, but yeah. I'll survive 2011. Go Sharon! Hahahaha, who am I kidding? My life is screwed. Fuck my fucking life.

What do you want from me?

2010-12-30T02:37:00.000-08:00

Today, I have confirmed that I'm not some attention-seeking bitch you see on the streets of geylang. Why? Because I dislike men, filthy men, looking at me like I'm their next to-do list. I don't do well under the spotlight, with so many pairs of eyes looking in my direction. No, that's just not me. I don't like the attention.

Ladies night at I don't know where. Initially went to Butter Factory, but it was mad crowded. Full house already. Then go see Zirca, Yello Jello, also the same. Ended up in Lunar. Stayed there for a while before cabbing back home. Drank on an empty stomach, but thank god I didn't drink so much, cos I wouldn't want to puke my way back home like the dude in the taxi stand. Poor guy. Tsk.Removing my makeup.

Sometimes, I wish you could see me cry.

2010-12-28T22:49:00.000-08:00

Maybe then, you'll know how much it hurts.

Every girl's pain. );

Quote

2010-12-28T11:22:00.000-08:00

"You said you'd buy me a ring on my birthday. Why did you lie to me?"

Grateful.

2010-12-27T08:39:00.000-08:00

Just a short appreciation post to those who actually took the extra effort other than just wishing me a "Happy birthday."

Firstly, I wanna thank Guiling, Angela, Cheryl & Alisah (& Guiling/Alisah's boyfriends) for the birthday celebration at Bugis Nabins last night. I know we initially planned on clubbing but even though its a last minute change of plans, thank you guys for adapting so fast. And hahahahaha, thanks for the ride, and the cake, and everything lah! You rock! \m/

Secondly, I wanna thank Sharlotte, Jiawen, Amir & Ignatius for the wonderful surprise! I know you know I luv chocolate, that's why you all bought the chocolate cake worxz. Hehehe. Thank you guys for travelling so far to my house just to surprise me. I seldom bring people come my house one hor. Honestly, you are the first ones who went all the way just to surprise me, I'm really really touched. You're the best! *hugs*

Thirdly, I want to thank those who actually called to wish me happy birthday. Especially my mummy and Wilson. That asshole prank call me. -.- But still, it's an added effort than your normal "Hello, happy birthday!" Mummy called from Thailand, just to wish her darling daughter happy birthday. Touched.

Fourthly, I wanna diss those people who I'm disappointed with. Yes, you. I told you my birthday coming, and you said you want to plan, fine I let you plan. I don't plan anything, everything I just leave to you. Wrong move, because you didn't even do a single thing apart from wishing me in facebook. Where's your so called plan? I entrusted you this day, for you to do whatever you like, you want bring me to heaven, bring me to hell also can, everything up to you. I leave this day, just for you. But you know what? You don't care. Just like all the things I've given you, you just don't give a damn. So stop saying things like you want to plan my birthday and whatnot, cause now I know even if I let you plan my damn funeral, you won't even do anything about it except wish me to rest in peace, in facebook. Hah, so that's your plan huh? A "happy birthday !" in facebook and that's it? Fuck you.

Done. Smile people. :)

The game of life

2010-12-26T23:00:00.000-08:00

E25L @ Marina Barage.

Thinking bout you, thinking bout me.

2010-12-25T13:13:00.000-08:00

You were so easy to love.

Christmas. I spent my day alone, in my room. -.- Hate my life. Seriously, when I need somebody, nobody's there. FML. I don't like being alone, especially after what I've gone through this past few weeks. I don't like facing the laptop for hours, when I can be out with people, keeping my mind off you. I don't want to be so emotional in my blog posts, but this feeling is seriously killing me. What I'm doing is harming myself. I can't keep lying here and neglect my health, I have a nasty cough that needs to be treated. But guess what? Nobody fucking cares.

Love don't come easy.

2010-12-24T07:01:00.000-08:00

Have you forgotten what it feels like to have someone wipe away your tears?

Met up with Stephanie few days ago. Initially planned on having steamboat, but ughh, long story. So we ate at I ♥ Taimei. I like their shake2 fries. shake shake here, shake shake there~ k, stop being lame. Had a really really long chat with her, then took bus 12 back together. Orh! I remember which day was it already. Yep, 24th, Friday. Ooohkay, that's how I spent my Christmas Eve.

'Cause you mean that much to me.

2010-12-23T10:57:00.000-08:00

Your heart is nothing but a human organ that keeps beating even when you feel like dying.

2010-12-22T08:03:00.000-08:00

Despite being horribly sick, I managed to drag my feet down to check on my mails. My trip wasn't wasted because 2 of my shopping packages arrived! Bought a dress from Whatisdope & a pair of jeggings from Sequinbows. Ahhhh, I'm squandering my money like crazy, must control, must control!

Oooookay, yes, I-AM-SICK. You seldom hear of me falling sick right? Haaaa. I hate being sick, really really. Everytime I fall sick, I'd lie in my bed, and cry. -.- Lame, I know. But I spent my day crying in my bed with the blankets over me because god-knows-what, from the hour I woke up until 2 hours ago. I remember when I was young, my mummy would always sit by my bed and sayang my forhead whenever I'm sick. The last time I got sick was during Febuary, I sat in the kitchen and cried to mummy. I want my mummy now. ); K, I know I'm turning 18 soon, and this is not acceptable for someone my age. Grow up, don't cry. *coughs*

Some photos I took just now. Super unglam, because I'm at home, duh. Don't think any handsome guys will be reading my blog either, hahahahaha. Where my prince charming go?? Awww.

I was literally like this throughout the day. Sad & lonely girl. </3

Meeting up with Marilyn & Stephanie on the 24th for steamboat, before going for Christmas service at CHC Jurong West. Very long never see them already! :D Then on the 26th, its Zirca with Guiling & co.! My first time going clubbing with them. Hahahaha, last time I was proud to say "I never club before." Because everyone's first impression of me is that I chao ah lian, got smoke, got club, got curse, got swear. Tsk. Okay la, I admit I got curse a bit. A bit only! I don't go around in the streets hollering hokkien profanities though. That's quite a turn off to me. Seriously, those who do that must stop asap. It ain't cool, you know? :/

Argh, my head is throbbing. Gimme more luv please.

Live it or regret it.

2010-12-20T19:53:00.000-08:00

People are telling me to stop. I guess, I should. One day, I will say to your face, "Fuck off from my life, you bastard." I don't need you to make me feel complete.

The only difference was when I said "I love you", I wasn't lying.

2010-12-19T09:25:00.000-08:00

Last day of school. You can see my dear baby Sharlotte getting emotional and all. ); It's okay baby, I still love you baby. You're always in my heart baby. Forever and ever baby. Hahahaha. Me, her & excessive PDA. Such great love! ♥♥♥My baby Sharlotte. ^^Sharlotte, Benjamin, Amir, Jiawen, Sharon!

Went for Christmas carolling on Saturday. We signed up for it because there was free bodyshop stuff and 2 CE points! Easy right? And fun bodoh! At Paragon somemore!Excessive PDA. Our love is so much greater than Jiawen & Ignatius' one! Muahahaha.Sharon, Sharlotte, Amir. Jiawen.Jiawen, Sharlotte, Sharon, Amir.Ooh, you know the movie Tron? Yeah! Look @ the handsome dude in the middle! Heheh. HELP ME LIKE THIS PHOTO!

Go to Tron SG on Facebook. HERE. Like the page!
View the photo we posted. HERE.Like the photo!
If you can't find the like button, then after step 1, go to the wall, scroll down until you see the photo in the news feed. Then, LIKE IT!

Okay, fyi, if you're wondering why I have my hand around Amir's arm, its because we are just fwenzzzzz. There's alot of people asking us whether we are a couple or not. -.- LIKE LOL. AMIR GHANI IS MY HAO PENG YOU. THE PERSON I'M DATING IS.... MY BABY SHARLOTTE. HAHAHAHAHA.

Watched Pulse II at Cineleisure chamber. Sharlotte & I seriously cmi, the movie haven't even start yet and we already scared to death. Hais. Can't help it if we are so compatible with one another. Hahahaha.

Sexy, pretty & cute.Group shot! Jiawen, Amir, Sharlotte, Sharon, Ignatius.

I miss the way you caress my hand.

2010-12-18T18:31:00.000-08:00

Universal Studios baby!

Last friday was the last day of school, so we went to USS after school! Happy much. :3 Photos.

Losers beg, I just give up.

2010-12-18T08:58:00.000-08:00

17 December, Friday: Universal Studios.
18 December, Saturday: Street carolling at Paragon.
20 Decomber, Monday: E25L class outing at Marina Barage.
21 December, Tuesday: Eunice's birthday & cheer practice.

Look forward to my awesome blog posts okay?

Okay, I know whatever I say or do is useless because you won't even look at me like the way you used to. You won't even act like you care anymore. Why is it so hard to act like I don't care, but so easy for you to act like you cared? Stop feeding me lies like I'm a child.

Attraction Factor

2010-12-16T04:35:00.000-08:00

HTM OCL on Wednesday. My whole body was aching because of training the day before, I didn't do physical training and warm ups prior to practising the stunts so yeah, I'm feeling sore all over, even now. Oh well, headed off to Sentosa from school. Weather's a bitch that day, the sun was blazing hot like dunno what like that. Tsk.

Photos from Xuelin & Cheryl.Xuelin, me, Kailing.

& Xuelin.& Kailing.& Marilyn.Wahidah, Siow wei, me, Kezann.& Tee Hui.& Cheryl.Pastamania for Dinner.

WALAO, EVEN MY ARMPITS ALSO ACHING. WHAT IS THIS MAN.

No feelings invested.

2010-12-15T18:21:00.000-08:00

Carpe diem.

You want to play? Fine, I'll play with you. I know the rules now - just don't fall in love.

How far are you willing to go for love?

2010-12-14T07:20:00.000-08:00

To keep myself busy, I decided to go back to cheerleading!!!!!! YES, AFTER 6 MONTHS, I'M GOING TO FLY AGAIN! Went for my first practice today, and guess what? I did an extension without falling back! I never could do that when I was in POS. :/ Teehee. I'm so happy for myself because I've been procrastinating about taking up cheerleading, but now I took the first step and tadah! I'm flying again! Okay, but I still need practice though, still a baby cheerleader.

Soooo, school is getting more and more boring. I've been sleeping a lot, even my faci commented about it. Shit, must stop already. But this few days I reach school damn early worxz! Today I reach school at 7:50am. Damn early right?! Hahaha. Also my first time taking MRT to school. LOL.

Okay, so... my life is stained. Like wtfxz. I need someone to talk some sense into me because I'm ruining my life pretty badly. Oh god, what the hell is happening to me? I wasn't like this in the past.

My ass hurts. :o

I've gone through hardships before.

2010-12-12T00:54:00.000-08:00

Saturday. Took these before going to church. I was already running late, still can take photos. Tsk.

[EDITED]

More photos from Huiwah. :D

Even more from Kendrick.

So raise your glass if you are wrong, in all the right ways.

2010-12-10T09:05:00.000-08:00

The only thing that keeps me happy are my fwenz. Movie @ Cine after school today. Saw Cheryl & Evelyn at town too. Oh well, initially wanted to watch Rapunzel but the seats were fully booked, so we settled for "Let Me In". And we went into the cinema without knowing the summary of the movie. LOL. It's yet another bloodsucking-vampire-meets-human-and-they-fall-in-love movie. So damn cliche.

Photos. My darling Sharlotte Boswell!

More photos from Ignatius's webcam.

Set them free.

2010-12-09T07:56:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know my birthday is coming and I don't even have anything planned on that day - except going to ESPS to buy Joyanna's school books for next year. WTF -.-

But, I just feel like spending all my money on buying birthday presents for myself! I wanna buy cute, useless, worthless junk just to make me happy! :D Like the couple keychain I came across online. LOL. I know I'm not attached, but I like this pair of couple keychain ehh! Super expensive looking right? WHY SINGAPORE DON'T HAVE? T.T

Okay. Anyway, I realised it's week 9 already. Walao, so fast. But being at home alone is super boring. K la, I got my grandmother with me, but I spend like 90% of the time inside my room alone, watching Glee, Gossip Girl, Vampire Dairies, Nikita. SO LONELY~~~ I want to go shopping. Okay, forget it. I go emo one corner draw circles sua.

Meh meh.

2010-12-08T04:45:00.000-08:00

Ooh, ordered Pizza Hut delivery few days ago. I absolutely love their baked beefballs. But $5.80 like very expensive right? :/ Don't care! I want to eat again!!!Oh, this is the laptop I was using. Like super small leh! It's slightly over 10" only. If I bring to school, can just put inside my bag, no need bring laptop sleeve. SO CONVENIENT. But got no Microsoft Office. Tsk.

Okay, shall go watch my Gossip Girl now.

Photobooth.

2010-12-07T07:05:00.000-08:00

Okay, I've uploaded my zilian photos as promised. Super heavy on my eye makeup. I remember being really really sad and emo on that day, so I decided to slather on layers and layers of eyeshadow on my eyelids + falsies. Hmm.. I think I was just trying to hide.. something I didn't want to show. Don't want to appear sad infront of the public.Okay. I didn't edit the 2nd last photo though. Oh, and in the photo before that, you can see the laptop I've been using during the weekend when my laptop failed on me. But don't worry, the IT geek helped me solve the problem. Turns out the system created a temp profile because of improper shutdown. -.- That's why the user profile service failed the logon. Damn.

Cameroid.Vitamin C overdose. Step yi ge emo kia. Machiam drug addict. Wtfzzz.

"Quack Quack."

Met Guiling after school. Dinner at Mcdonalds. :D Spent like 2 hours with her, heart to heart talks, letting off steam. Ahahahah. Yeah, when my life is screwed, I really need a girl like her to listen to all my troubles. :D Hehe. As we grow up, our topics of conversation changes too. So many things in common. Tsk! Meeting her soon!

i hate you

2010-12-06T05:28:00.000-08:00

i hate you. i seriously do. for someone so unworthy, what i did was a huge sacrifice. why can't you see? how can someone like you exist on earth? how can you crush me so simply. i really hate you. for every tiny thing you do, everything you say. i hate it. i don't like what i'm seeing. don't do this. i really don't like it. please stop. it hurts, it really hurts. i have feelings too you know. im still human, don't hurt me like this, i don't like it. don't treat me this way. i don't want to see you do all these things. i don't want to hear you hurting people like this. i don't want to feel like trash. don't rub salt into my wounds. there's a threshold to everything. you're going beyond the limit. stop it now, please.

Friday.

2010-12-05T23:43:00.000-08:00

Short post. Went to Town with Amir. Decided to do out RJ at Mcdonalds, but when I tried to log into my account, I got "The User Profile Service failed the logon. User profile cannot be loaded." WTFFFF?!?!?! Heartbreak. );

Nehhh mind, photos here.My Entreprenurship team's busniness plan is stressing me out. -.-

I deserve more than this.

2010-12-04T08:45:00.000-08:00

What's the point of loving you when you don't love me?
What's the point of caring for you when you don't care for me?
What's the point of thinking of you when you don't think of me?
What's the point of holding on to you then you don't hold on to me?

Okay. I should stop being so emo. I'm turning 18 in a few weeks time, please be happy, Sharon. Someone will love you soon yeah. This feeling is only momentary. I'm sure it will pass soon. Shall blog more next time kay? And I shall upload more of my zilian photos.

Hi, I'm recyclable trash. Use me, but don't forget to recycle me.

2010-12-02T05:41:00.000-08:00

I don't know why
I'm so afraid of losing you
when you aren't even mine
Being alone is strangely destructive. I have a box of chocolates beside me, and now they're all in my tummy. *looks to my right* Oh, a box of chocolate wrappers. Sigh. I walk around the house in my bra/underwear. LOL. What is this man? I'm becoming more and more lax, must seriously stop already. I must train myself to be a housewife. Since I got no future in education, I guess I'm destined to be a diploma-holder housewife. C'mon, MARRY ME! I'll take good care of your babies! My life is so boring, I feel like giving birth to a bunch of kids just to keep myself busy. HAHAHA.
Okay. Down to earth. My life is pretty much screwed up now. Made so many wrong decisions which led to the death of my relationship with Vincent. God, why am I blogging about this??! Alright, I'm picking up the pieces myself. Facing the consequences myself. But nothing beats seeing my mistake when I see your face, almost everyday at school. I am so naive. I must grow up, there is no such thing as love at first sight. People who tell you that, are only bullshitting. Trust me. Been there, done that. Liars.
My birthday is on 27 December. Wish me happy birthday okay?? :D

Being a Boswell never felt this good.

2010-11-30T20:45:00.000-08:00

More than just ordinary friends. <3My new fringe cute or not? But I tell you, it looks much shorter in reality, and I look like a friggin faggot.

School has been pretty much sucky for me. Can't seem to wake up on time nowadays. I need motivation!!!!!!! :/ Being alone at home sucks too. T.T Nobody to talk to, I feel like a single child. Ahhhh, lonelygirl92. Want go shopping also lazy, I just ordered jeggings online, hope it fits. Hmm. Entreprenuership UT today. Didn't study for it, procrastination really kills. But I'm convinced I'm a clever girl, so yeah. I get C I happy already. Like I said, I'M NOT AIMING FOR A BLOODY SCHOLARSHIP. Holidays in 2 weeks time! Ohohohoh, and my birthday is coming up too! :>

Telling you I believe you when I obviously don't, seems much easier now.

What do I lack in my life?

2010-11-29T03:43:00.000-08:00

SELF-DISCIPLINE.

Then I'm afraid this is the end.

2010-11-28T17:45:00.000-08:00

Hello people. Blogging in first break. Heh. So where did I left off? Oh. Okay, went to Tampines Mall to find Jianhong before heading off to church. He's working there. These past few weeks, I not late wor! I remember I used to take cab to church almost every week. Tsk. Waste money. Dinner at Tampines mall (again) with the cellgroup. And we played Monopoly deal after that. Okay, I seriously suck at that game luh.

Went to cut my hair on Sunday. My fringe damn short. :(

Oh, I just realised this morning, that my family is flying off to Thailand today. Zzz.. How could I be so forgetful about such a thing manxz? Oh well, faci came back already. She just sent 3 students home for inappropriate attire. Lucky I wore spandex skirt, then when she asked me to stand up, I pulled my skirt long. Heheh.

You're hot then you're cold.

2010-11-26T20:36:00.000-08:00

I luv this girl nehxz.

Late for school yesterday. I seriously don't know why I spend so much time bathing in the morning. Oh, I like to bathe in hot water. Everytime I bathe, I always turn my shower's heater to the hottest level. Hah. Very hot, I like! Then when I'm in the shower, I don't feel like stepping out of it because I'll get cold! I guess I was late because of that uh. :/

Entreprenuership today. Faci early in the morning pms. And the whole class can tell lor. Oh well, after school, went to meet Jiawen & Sharlotte for Nigel's birthday celebration at his condo. BBQ. I tell you hor, Jiawen damn sadistic! She use the matchstick to burn the ants you know??! Tsk, this girl ah.. But like fun only. Hahahahahaha. Ended at 11pm. Sharlotte's mummy sent me to the bus stop, took bus 72, home! :D

Just hit play and watch my life fall apart.

2010-11-24T23:08:00.000-08:00

Updating my blog while faci is going through the 6P. Super boring. Why do I have to deal with imaginary numbers that don't exist? Tell me.I've been playing plants vs zombies since morning until now. Addicted already. Tsk tsk tsk.

Yesterday. Went to meet Eunice & her boyfriend at night. Had shark fin soup from the pasar malam. Luv luv.

Tuesday. Town with clique. Pastamania for dinner.

Aren't we adorable?!?! WE SHO CUTE NEHXZ!Handicapped toilet. :x

Quote

2010-11-23T23:42:00.000-08:00

"‎Fall in love when you're ready, not when you're lonely."

Swensens & Harry Potter

2010-11-22T17:10:00.000-08:00

So, few days ago I made a bet with Amir that travelling from Woodlands to Tampines takes 50 mins. But I lost the bet. :/ If I had won, he would have treated me to B&J ice cream lor! Went to Swensens with Amir after school yesterday for ice cream! Had fun bitching with him - we had soooo many things to talk about. Shhhhh~ Arcade & Macdonalds afterwards.

Then at 6.45pm, I left to meet Esther & co. for movie @ PS. Harry Potter. Didn't really understand at the beginning, the only thing that kept running through my mind is "Emma Watsons is very pretty." And another thing was, Harry Potter is not a comedy, why is everyone laughing??! I don't understand the HP jokes, at all. But overall, it's quite not bad.

Reached home after midnight, and I missed the time to submit my RJ. Too lazy to email my faci too. FORGET IT LAH! I'm not aiming for a scholarship anyway.

Oh, I overslept today. Woke up at 6.50am, but I took cab with papa to school. He blessed me with a $50 note when I got out of the cab. Jealous or not?! My papa #1 leh.

Quote

2010-11-21T07:26:00.000-08:00

"Even the most beautiful things can hurt you."

sibeilonelygal92@hotmail.com

2010-11-19T03:28:00.000-08:00

I lost everything I loved. I destroyed my own relationship. I deserve this. I'm no different from a bitch. I hate myself for doing this. I hate myself for not repenting from my mistakes. I hate myself for not being able to resist tempations. I hate myself for underestimating my love. I hate myself for being unfaithful. I hate myself for letting my heart waver. I hate myself for not disciplining myself. I hate myself for opening my heart that easily. I hate myself for not listening to warnings. I hate myself for being influenced without realising. I hate myself for who I'm turning into. I hate myself for hurting him. I hate myself for not being able to leave him. I hate myself for saying those words to him. I hate myself for giving up. I hate myself for not letting go. I hate myself for turning my back against the person who cared for me. I hate myself for ending this relationship. I hate myself for keeping secrets from him. I hate myself for falling in love with a fucking liar who only know how to toy with girls and dump them when they're bored, not giving a damn about what damage he has done.

Nocturnal friend. Yap Yap.

2010-11-15T17:55:00.000-08:00

Initially wanted to go Powerhouse last night with Eunice, but there was a slight last minute change of plans. Met Eunice at my house there at 10pm?? She needed to use my laptop's microsoft word. Went to Tampines Mart Macdonalds for supper. Took a few webcam shots, went home at 1am plus. Yeah, I keep spending time out so late. Tsk. Should stop already luh. Got exam you know?!

Oh by the way, there was a technical glitch for Maths UT1. Ahahahahahah, I bet those who studied for the UT must be cussing the school right now.

come clean.

2010-11-13T22:42:00.000-08:00

I am single. Yes, after 1 year 10 months of my relationship with Vincent. My longest relationship. What happened between us? I really don't know. I guess it's because of the distance between us that keep growing, than until one day, I realised, that it was okay for me to live the distance. No one should feel this way. It just showed that I could live without him. I'm not supposed to feel this way. I thought I was dependent on him, very dependent. There were so many reasons why I broke up with him; 1. I cheated on him. I don't know what defines cheating, but there was infidelity involved. Not just one, not two. More. But of course, I won't say who the people are. I don't think there's a need to drag them into this mess. 2. I felt that the relationship was not pure anymore. I can't possibly look at him in the eye, and laden with guilt, say "I love you" to him. Because if I really loved him, I wouldn't do such a thing behind his back. 3. Love lost. Probably while he was away, there was no one whom I could turn to, and when someone comes along and makes you feel special, your feelings starts to waver. Now I can't go back. The love is lost, the feeling is not right anymore. 4. One of the most cliche phrases you will ever hear - He deserves someone better. And I mean it. I can never stay faithful in a relationship. In my relationship with Lai Hock, I went out with another man, now I'm doing the same, but worse. With feelings. I've told Vincent about it because he does not deserve to be hidden in the dark about my actions. I still care for him, I still think about him. Afterall, the love we shared were real. I can't just possibly forget about it overnight. I can't even bring myself to delete those photos I took with him. I know once I made the decision to leave him, I have to throw away all I've got of him. But I just can't do it. Maybe it's because of the attachment I still have with him, that's why I can't completely cut myself off from him. I don't know why I'm so implusive and rash at such decisions, but I can't carry the consequences that follow my decision. Right now, my heart is at a blunder, I have thought of going back to him, when I hear him cry over the phone, it breaks my heart, but I had to be strong and firm about my decision. Yes, I want to hug him tightly, I want to sleep in his arms, I want to kiss his lips again. But I can't. I can't love him again even if I wanted to. It's such a loss to love the guy who have loved me so dearly, and at the same time lose another guy was responsible for making my feelings waver. Tragic. I just can't let go of the both of them, emotionally. I know I'm being selfish saying this, but it's really the truth. And I know it hurts Vincent seeing someone he love care about another person. Well, I'm feeling the exact same as him. But with this feeling, I also have to carry this guilt of leting someone who loves me feel hurt. I might be chirpy with all my friends, being nonchalant over what had happened, but every night, I think of Vincent. And I think of his wounded heart. I feel really guilty for dropping a bomb on him so suddenly. I really wanted to go give him a hug, but I can't. I really want to call him, or text him, but I can't. I'm restraining myself from doing so many things what I wanted to, and love is not supposed to be this way. I need a shoulder to lean on. Or a distraction to prevent me from thinking about all these problems. I know it will go away soon, but I need someone to make it go away. Someone who will listen to me, care for me. There's nobody by my side. I feel empty inside. Take me away, someone.

I lubb my fwenz.

2010-11-12T03:07:00.000-08:00

Ugh, I've been having blocked nose for few days already. I used like 3 packets of tissue in one day lor. Feel damn terrible, keep sneezing somemore.

Yesterday after HTM UT1, Jiawen, Sharlotte, Amir, Ignatius, Nigel and I went for dinner at Causeway and had ice cream at Swensens! Frosty chocolate malt ftw! Hehe. Reach home quite late uh. Still haven't do RJ yet lor. But thankfully I was reminded, or else I confirm get D for that day. But I'm starting to think that my Maths faci sibei cute uh. Shhhh.. *shy*

Alright, that's it. Shall blog more next time!

healed wounds, but the scars remain.

2010-11-09T11:57:00.000-08:00

Late night talk with Karen is ♥♥♥.

I need time & I need answers. You're not the one waiting too, I'm waiting for my answers too, you know. There are some things that I need to settle before finalizing this decision. For every wrong I've done, I am awefully sorry. But you deserve better. One day, you will grow to hate me, and you'll tell everyone how much of a bitch I am. For the hurt I've inflicted in your heart, I know karma will be waiting to strike back at me twice as hard. I need to brace myself for the next fall.

Every rose has its thorn.

2010-11-07T08:43:00.000-08:00

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. :)

You pathetic worthless loser

2010-11-06T09:33:00.000-07:00

*My shoulder look like it has bruises. I'm not being abused or what okay. It's just caused by the chains on my shoulder bag.

I think I spent alot of money already ehh. Took cab to Expo today because I was already running late for service. I know I last time like to take cab one, but now I'm trying to minimize already luh. Everytime I take cab, I very heartpain neh. </3

Pst Phil Pringle laid hands today. Hmm, it's been a nong nong time since I felt the Lord's presence. Despite what I've gone through, ultimately, God's love never fails. Agape love, unconditional love.

Actually I typed alot just now one, but suddenly the page refreshed. -.-

I played with fire and got burnt really bad. Should've listened to my mind instead of my heart. But it's okay, I shall be a big girl now and learn from this experience. I know I'm stronger than this. I need to change my ways already. I can't keep hurting myself this way, I will only destroy myself. Nobody else will ever touch me or hurt me, love me or leave me.

On a happier side note, Vincent's coming back tomorrow. We haven't been on good terms with one another lately. Sigh~

Okay, I got nothing to say now. :x

My heart is being ridiculous.

2010-11-04T19:39:00.000-07:00

I woke up with puffy eyes. Cried too much I guess.

Sugar, spice & everything nice.

2010-11-03T03:16:00.000-07:00

Today was HTM module. Class went to Vivo for lesson, a bit tiring luh. We were supposed to walk around Vivo to gather up information about 3 restaurants. Lame but yeah, finished in like 15 minutes. Slept at BK, then proceeded to sleep more at Haagen Dazs. LOL. Pig.I lubb moii fwenz worxzxz.

A leopard will never change its spots

2010-10-30T21:12:00.000-07:00

The world is cruel. Everybody is evil. Yet nobody is aware of that.

Selfish girl, protecting her heart before the people she loves.

third week of school

2010-10-28T07:58:00.000-07:00

Still kinda suck.

I think I pissed one of my faci off. And he's actually quite lenient to me for the past 2 weeks, wonder how is he going to grade me after knowing that I'm such a skany bitch. Sigh. There goes my grades. ):

My family's going to Thailand during the December holidays. Left me alone because apprently, I have school on December. My birthday you know?! But got 2 weeks break la. Oh oh oh, I'm going on an excursion next week! Woooo~ Poly student going on excursion, still need consent form on wor! We Republicans are such attention seekers. Have you heard? We made the headlines in The New Paper yesterday! *raise eyebrows* But hor, all my dresses like short only leh. If they really enforce this dresscode, then I GG already. Everyday wear jeans to school sua.

I need to sleep nao! Or else tomorrow cannot wake up. Goodnight.

Quote

2010-10-27T04:37:00.000-07:00

"Behind every stong soldier, there is an even stronger woman who stands behind him, supports him, and loves him with all her heart."

So beat it, just beat it.

2010-10-26T05:31:00.000-07:00

Darling ahhhhh~ 1 week 5 days left. Come back quick. I got surprise for you! Heheh. *wink wink* I very lonely here. ): Super broke also. Sigh. Short post before I sleep. I must sleep early or else tomorrow cannot wake up in time. I must find a seat in bus 168. I've been standing in the bus for 2 consecutive days already. Hate it lor. KIJUHNYBGVFDC.

I don't like my FA faci. Because for the 1st week, she give me D. 2nd week, give me C. Asshole. _|_

I MISS MY BOYFRIEND.

Give me a minute of your time

2010-10-25T03:57:00.000-07:00

Sentosa with clique on Sunday. Met up at Vivo to buy snacks first.

Amir, Ridhwan & me. We bought like damn alot of things la. In the end, cannot finish. Wasted.Sharlotte, Jiawen & me.Went to find Kailing at Cafe Del Mar.Me and Sharlotte.Doggie! But the man at the backgroud abit spoiler luh. SEE HIS TUMMY! WTF!!!!!!!!!Group shot.

Played volleyball and soccer there. My hidden talent siaaaa! *flex muscles* LOL. Didn't really go into the water. There was no sun either, so cannot sun tan. Ooh, got hotties to look at though.

Back to Vivo.Another group shot.Last shot before heading home.

More @ facebook.

Girl, you need to prioritise.

2010-10-22T09:05:00.000-07:00

My free luggage tag. Teehee. Remember I said that I also customised a luggage tag for Bb, but he left Singapore before the luggage tags arrived. -.- Nehhhmind, shall use them for our honeymoon. Ahahahah.

School today. TGIF. Cell group meeting @ Ethan's house thereafter. Rush here rush there. Tsk. And there's work tomorrow. $_$ <-- my money face.

Because we're too young to understand.

2010-10-21T10:26:00.000-07:00

Lappy's current wallpaper.

Emo post.

Bb, if it was ever possible, I'd fly over to Australia just to see you once. One hug for comfort, another hug for assurance, one more for love. I thought I was strong enough to bear the distance between us, but I was proven wrong when I broke down in tears after seeing 5 missed calls from you. Again. Which asshole will cry over a few missed calls? Me. Because I know if I miss the chance to talk to you, I might have to wait for 24, maybe 48 or even 72 hours before you call again. I don't know. Your absence is really making me flip inside out. I can't set anything straight. I tried to push you out of my head, but everytime I close my eyes, I see your face. My heart aches. I've underestimated my love for you.

I'm not doing fine. I want hug hug.

Dog for the day

2010-10-20T07:37:00.000-07:00

HTM module today. Had to wear formal, I feel so... overdressed. Can't believe I'll be doing this every Wednesday for 15 weeks. *smacks forehead* I was pretty early for class today. :D Hmm, today's lesson was about 7 wonders of the world. Quite interesting.

After class, the girls had to attend this compulsory grooming briefing. You know hospitality is very particulat about grooming standards. The length of my skirt that I was wearing is half the length of the supposed "appropriate" knee length skirts. -.-

"We are like little gingerbread cookies. Fresh out of the oven."

Shopped around Causeway with Geik Chang & co. after the briefing.

Home. Took a few webcam shots with my zippy duck duck.Darling, this is what happens when you leave me for too long:My 2 best friends.Karen came home, so I took a few shots with her. Okay, alot. It's her birthday tomorrow!

The pains of a mother.

2010-10-18T05:15:00.000-07:00

Marketing today. I was late for school, not my fault. Blame it on the accident that happened at Woodlands this morning. There were articles of it on STOMP. Blardy hell, because of this, I was stuck on the road for 20 minutes. If you follow my tweets, you'll know. I wasn't supposed to be late, dammit.After school, I went home straight before heading out to Tampines Mart to trim my fringe. Notice my fringe is a little shorter heh. Vincent keep wanting me to cut bangs but I scared I cut then ugly leh. Then he don't love me anymore! T.TMet mummy too. It's been very long since I saw my dearest mummy.*Eeee!* act cute sia!Little sissy!

Sniff the cash.

2010-10-17T10:03:00.000-07:00

Money makes the world go round.

Lies and deceit everywhere. It's really making me doubt the genuinity of teenage love relationships. How can someone be so passionate on the outside but so pretentious within? Sometimes, you don't even know the mask you're wearing. It becomes embeded in your face, it becomes who you are. A changed person.

Disregard my previous paragraph if you're too shallow to understand.

Went shopping with myself today. Bought a blazer for school. Damn HTM module need to wear formal every Wednesday. Most of my clothes reveal too much skin. Tsk. Why so sexy ah?!?!

Passed a day without you.

2010-10-16T13:33:00.000-07:00

Sigh, you're only gone for a day and I feel terrible. );

Come back quick. Your baby misses you.

21 days without you.

2010-10-15T10:15:00.000-07:00

My boyfriend is flying off to Australia, in a few hours time. I can't sms him. I can't call him. I can't say "Bb! I want hug hug!" to him anymore. ): I am lonelygirl1314. Meh. Had this farewell dinner with his family just now. Ooh, he fetched me from school today (again!). Then he bought a screen protector for his itouch. Ahhhh, can't play my Plants vs Zombies anymore! T.T

Town with clique tomorrow.

Nothing lasts forever

2010-10-14T00:37:00.000-07:00

First day of school was dope. Don't like my class. Nobody to bitch with, I so lonely. But thankfully, clique's classes are at the same level. Lunch with them for 3 consecutive days already. Hais. And South foodcourt sucks la. I want my Lawn. I want my W45H. ):

Vincent had 1 week leave before he fly to Aussie. I've been spending much time with him! <3 Went to Wheelock yesterday to collect his itouch from epi centre. Hmm, maybe going town with clique this weekend? I wanna try the popcorns at the Cornery. Last time Karen bought popcorns from there. Yummy. I like. Haha.

Today got flea bazzaar. But I lazy go uh. Waiting for Vincent to fetch me from school. Shouldn't have asked him to come at 4pm. Today my faci damn lax, keep on skipping the 6P slides. Lousy.

Guiling's 18! /Work @ SIM

2010-10-13T06:04:00.000-07:00

Okay, this is a little outdated already cuz it was on 10 October, and it's already the 14th. I SLOW LA DEY.

Anyway, celebrated her 18th birthday at this place at Sultan Gate.

Photos are not in order.Guiling & Angela. My fwenz. <3 Gossipping bitches.Birthday girl. She's grown so much! So scandalous! Tsk!Photos below are with Angela. We are such whores! Keep spamming GL's camera with idiotic photos.Fuck face.Me and birthday girl!Retarded, as always.One sexy girl kissing the "bee hive". LOL.Wanted to pose like rockstars, but fail ahhhh. CMI.Card game.

Group shot.

More photos at her album. Okay, now I shall blog about my work at SIM!

So, this happened on a thursday, few days before GL's birthday. Do your math. Went to chill with Charmaine & co. at Clarke Quay after work.Me, Geik Chang, Charmaine.Clarke Quay.

Steamboat @ Marina Square Yuki Yaki

2010-10-09T10:29:00.000-07:00

Steamboat with Bb & co. at Yuki Yaki.

Went to Bb's house early in the morning. I love seeing him sleep luh. I keep saying "Good morning!" to him. Hahaha. Received a call from Shelia asking us what we are wearing for the dinner afterwards. Turns out Bb's friends told the rest to wear formal for the dinner. LOL! For a minute I felt underdressed. Haha. But nehh mind. Had sushi buffet/steamboat for dinner. They don't have man tou. ): It was very filling. But the variety too little already luh. I WANNA GO EAT STEAMBOAT AGAIN!!

Carpe Diem

2010-10-08T05:16:00.000-07:00

With Eunice.

Met her after 8936742 years. Went to downtown east for dinner at Pastamania. Should have ordered pasta instead of baked rice. Tsk. Catching up with her was lurrve. Pasir Ris park afterwards. Then went home. Yeah, that's about it.

Clever Bitch.

2010-10-06T05:23:00.000-07:00

I got 3.1 for my GPA! Happy happy girl. Oh, and I got an A for OB UT3! Didn't expect it, hahaha. I hate Science, it pulled my grades down. The only C I got. Damn.

Yay! Revamped my Netvibes!

2010-10-05T11:05:00.000-07:00

One of the managers from Conrad called me to work on Thursday. O.o Seems like I'm going to work one last day for more ka-ching ka-ching!! $_$

Quote

2010-10-04T03:37:00.000-07:00

"Fight for the things you love. Love the things worth fighting for."

@thelovestories

I GOT MY PERIOD! I GOT MY PERIOD! I GOT MY PERIOD!

2010-10-03T23:26:00.000-07:00

Went to find my Baobei on Sunday morning too. You occasionally get better quality photos when I charge my camera. And when my camera's down, all my photos posted are from my handphone. Ahahah.Enjoy this moment when my camera is charged. I'M STARVING.

A kiss on the forehead makes everything alright. ♥

2010-10-02T09:56:00.000-07:00

Hello people! Today was a very fruitful day! Went to find Vincent early in the morning. I reached his house at like 9 am plus. Very early right? Haha, that's because I didn't sleep at all! Besides, we planned to make breakfast together - so I must be there in the morning! I wanna make cute lil sandwiches for him!Heart shaped cookie cutter which I brought.He doesn't like me taking photos of him. :(Oh lookie, the sandwich I made!!

Prepped myself for our date to Bugis! Okay la, I edited those photos, but I don't have photoshop and I'm using an online editor. Not really great, but still my jawline looks better after editing.Haha, look at my right temple. Most jialat one. Anyhow use smudge tool to clear my stray hairs off my face. LOL. But do you like my hair?!?! I braided my fringe!Dined at Manhattan Fish Market. Didn't take any photos during the time when we were in Bugis. We... uhm... quarrelled, again. But my Baobei the best la. He wiped away my tears and kissed my forehead. I love him because of those little actions he does. <3 Bought a denim dress too.My #1 boyfriend in da world.Cute.Goodnight people.

Cherry cherry boom boom

2010-09-30T08:09:00.000-07:00

I'm damn bored now. I know I should be sleeping cuz I need to be at CHC, JW at 11am to serve for Children's Day. Uggghh, so early. But I'm looking forward to the day! :D Happy Children's Day kiddos. Should I wake up earlier to serve both services? Hmm.. Shall see about that. Maybe I'll take up another time slot on the weekend then go find Vincent after that. Hehe, good girlfriend!

Ouh, just checked - they only have services at Expo on Saturday. Hmm..

Anyway, I just ordered 2 dresses online from a Korean Spree!! K, I know it's abit too soon to spend my money after I just bragged about having the $150 tip few days ago, but this spree is ending soon leh!! Somemore the dress very cheap! Nothing over $20! So must quickly place my orders. Haha. I should seriously stop buying dresses already la. My closet can't fit all my clothes anymore. ):

Everyone needs a LDB. One, or maybe two of them. At least.I know the model looks fat in here, but I'm convinced I'm not as fat as her. So I guess my tummy fats won't be bulging out in this bodycon dress right. It looks like it's tailored for petite models only. But I like leh.

I seriously need to stop spending money like this. Hais.

My darling's booking out tomorrow! But I don't know why everybody can book out today but he cannot. Nehhhh mind. Bb got life firing this week, he very good at life firing one. Maybe can win some $$ then treat me eat ice cream. Heheh. Oh ya, I bought Magnum Gold ice cream for my sister just now. See, I'm such a good sissy. :D

1 year 8 months of your love. Still not enough!

2010-09-29T07:39:00.000-07:00

Babyyyyy~ It's the 29th of the months again! This marks yet another month of our relationship! We've gone through ups and downs this past month. And a really really rough patch that almost tore us apart, but nonetheless, we're still together yeah. I lubb chu~

Vincent & I are going on a date this weekend. I'm going to treat him good food with the $$ I got from work! Initially I planned on dining at Swensens or Pizza Hut, but I chucked that aside because I wanted to try something new. Maybe parfaits at Benten Cafe, Illuma! But then my Bb don't like ice cream. :/ Awww, nehmind. Let's try Kim Gary!! :D Hahahahaha.

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

2010-09-27T09:08:00.000-07:00

I seldom take reflection shots of myself. Hahaha, this is latest one I suppose. Dated way back in May.Dear Sharon Boswell,

Please grow some boobs. HAHAHAHA. Noooooo, even skinny people have bigger boobs than me. Sad. But everybody likes my hair! Me too! I think my hair is the nicest asset of my body. Teehee. I like my silhouette, but not my figure. ):

Money faced bitch.

2010-09-27T08:04:00.000-07:00

My work at Amber Lounge is finished! Damn tired. Ughhhhh~ I don't like the manager. Shall curse him before I slep tonight. Ahahahah, jk. Thomas Sabo event on Wednesday. (Yes, I know I blogged about it in my previous post.) There's photos of the event uploaded in xinmsn.com Party Photos! I dropped a champagne glass and broke it. );

Then for the big night - 25th & 26th. Yet another fashion show on the 25th. Hervé Léger’s latest collection I think. Got bikini leh! But the table I was assigned to serve happened to be rowdy guys. Uh, quite uncomfortable standing there. Never give me tips also, assholes. As their server, I had to help them open the champagne bottle, but I've never opened one before. Only Heineken bottles. LOL. Didn't really serve them either, they wanted to pop the champagne cork at the crowd. -.-

On the 26th, we were told that the crowd's going to be bigger. Which means, we will be busier. Oh well, I was hoping that the people who reserved my table would be handsome ang mohs. Hahaha, whore. LOL. Didn't get my hopes fulfilled though. :/ Served them nonetheless. They keep asking for vodka shots. Very troublesome lehhhhh. Oh, and that was the first time I opened champagne for them! Teehee.

But the best damn thing of the night was, I got a $150 tip!

I was quite surprised and contented to see a $50 note given to me. But when I went to the clearing area at the back of the lounge (like how you people run into the toilet to check your ang pao $$ during CNY. Heheh.), I saw that it was actually 2 $50 notes! Happy max. Went to serve a little bit more, and got another $50 from the same man. My table rocks. \m/ The other table that I was assigned to didn't need much service from me. They were drinking champagne straight from the bottles. -.-

Went home to sleep after that. I reeked of vodka and champagne. Ugh. But thankfully the F1 is over! Shall treat Vincent good food! He treated me to Lerk Thai on Friday (I think). Now, it's my turn! I <3 good food. :D Next time, if I'm really very bo liao, I shall make him cute bear bear sandwiches like this!

Kawaii nehxzxz.

Working for banquet on Tuesday and Thursday. I want more $$! Hehehe.

People party only when the sky is dark.

2010-09-23T01:35:00.000-07:00

On site training on Tuesday. Clean those glasses until peng. Training ended at 7pm. Saw xiaoben working at Suntec. Like slack only lor his job, stand there take candid shots of OL only. Actual event on Wednesday. Thomas Sabo private event. Go google him up if you're that bo liao. Got handsome ang moh models ehhhhh~ But sad la, those models can't dance, only know how to walk. Disappointed. Saw quite a number of celebrities there too. I shall tell my Vincent more about it when he books out! Hehe. Training on Friday. I want ching ching! I'm going to treat mummy to Swensens when I get my pay! <3

Love notes in disguise

2010-09-20T14:10:00.000-07:00

I'll be working at Amber Lounge for the next week. The working hours is crazy. On Wednesday, its 4pm to 4am. Then on the F1 night (24th & 25th), I have to work from 7pm to 7am. The rest is on-site training, and that will start like 10 hours later. I'm still not sleeping. Please kill me.

Oh, I ordered this personalised luggage tag for Vincent few days back. I was contemplating whether to include my face in that photo of not cos I wasn't sure if I was (still) going to be in his life or not when the luggage tags arrive. (We were still in the midst of our quarrel, you see.) I wanted to give it to him when he goes to Wallaby for his NS training. He has less than a month left before he leaves. *tears. But because I'm an geographical idiot, I spent like an hour googling his postal code and deciding which photo to put on the front.

It will look like this. That's my sister's luggage tags, btw.

http://baggagelabel.klm.com/

They are free of charge by the way. But you know what? On Sunday, Vincent told me that he's not going to bring any luggage with him. Only a backpack, because all the luggages will be flown there first. Walao, then if I make him put the luggage tag on his backpack, later his army friends say he kiasu how? Nb, I personalise his luggage tag quite long leh. Nehmind, next time we go pre-honeymoon can use. Heheh.

Alright, laptop battery running low. I think it's a sign for me to sleep.

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

2010-09-20T02:58:00.000-07:00

I have alot of things to say to you, but it mainly consist of these 5 things. Not much, but yeah, that's about everything.

Your wooing tactics are very tacky.
I liked the attention you gave me.
Your breath stinks.
I hate the way you carry your bag.
Your girlfriend is ugly.

Weekends with Bb & Jiawen!

2010-09-19T23:12:00.000-07:00

Went to Bb's house on Saturday morning. We had a really really big quarrel 2 days before, I dunno whether is I thick-skinned or I'm too persistent, quarrel still go his house. LOL. I brought jelly beans for him! But my stay wasn't for very long because I had to prepare for my first day of work! It was a Chinese wedding/banquet. Whatever you call it. I hate carrying the Chinese tea. The teapot damn heavy. And those china staff very rude me and Jiawen. Hmph! 9 hours of work until 3.30 am. Pretty crazy right? Had night transport to Yishun to find my darling~ Slept there for the night. *hugs.

This week's gna be very hectic! I want $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

2010-09-17T05:46:00.000-07:00

Once again, nobody. :/

It's such a beautiful lie.

2010-09-15T21:28:00.000-07:00

My boyfriend called me and the first sentence he said was "I want to break up."

I really don't want to go through a second heartbreak. I don't want this relationship to come crumbling down. We built this relationship from scratch, I sacrificed, even when my mum don't want us to be together. Whenever my mum says anything bad about you, I, as her daughter, demanded an apology from her, my mother. My parents relationship failed. And I cried to you, saying not to leave me like how my mother did. You said you won't leave me. I love my mum, and I begged her to stay. I cried, I pleaded, she still left me. Now, you're leaving me too. I'd beg and cry to make you stay too. When I said I won't leave you, I didn't say it because you wanted to hear it, I didn't say it because it's for fun, I didn't say it because you needed the assurance. I said it because I simply won't leave you. I know I'm stubborn, I know where I'm wrong at. But do you? Even an outsider can say "I can tell that she loves her boyfriend". But you, as my boyfriend. Not even a single tinge of love? Who's the one not able to receive my affection? If I wanted to leave you, I would have done so months ago, but I stayed on. I chose to wait for you. I did so much for this relationship, it hurts to think of the memories I have to forget, the photos to delete, the gifts to discard, the heart to stop loving. Why do you have to leave me? You can scold me, hurt me, get angry at me, but why choose to leave?

I'm not disposable.

我是好老婆！

2010-09-14T08:02:00.000-07:00

I found a job at the Conrad Hotel! I already missed an opportunity to work at MBS last month, I'm not going to miss this chance again! $7/hr. Not bad right? After I get my pay, I'm going to treat Bb to a very very sumptuous meal and a bigger surprise for him! Heheh. We ♥ giving each other surprises.

Church on Saturday. Pst Phil Pringle was preaching that day. I can still remember the story about Jonah & the big fish. Except the protagonist wasn't Jonah, it was the fish. Fellowship at Airport. I had mini steamboat! Shall bring Bb there next time. And buy jelly beans from The Cocca Tree. They have chocolate and bubblegum jelly beans flavour. Mega love.

Served at CHCC on Sunday morning, saw Adeline too! Oh, I received lots of hearts from the children during Art & Craft. It warms my heart seeing all those hearts coloured with crayons given to me. Children's Day coming! I'm serving at Jurong West! I didn't serve for Children's Church last year because of my O levels, anticipating this day!

Bb came all the way from his camp to fetch me. Had lunch at Wendy's. The food there effing expensive.

Burger King + Macdonalds + KFC = Wendy's

I don't know when I did this. I must be damn bo liao.

I screwed up my Maths UT3. But just heck care, next semester work harder can already. I'm happy enough to graduate with a GPA of 2.1, furthermore I'm not aiming for Diploma with merit. WHY BOTHER HUH?! Throughout the whole semester, I've never attain a grade lower than a C, so even if I get F for this UT, IT WON'T AFFECT ME.

& I need to watch dramas that won't tempt me to skip watching all the episodes in the middle and jump to the last episode just to know the ending. Which idiot does that, seriously? My Girlfriend Is A Gumiho is getting boring. Sigh. I wanna watch Vampire Dairies 2. And my Gossip Girl! I've been waiting damn long for season 4! WHAT THE HELL HAPPEN TO CHUCK BASS?!?!

On a brighter note, I downloaded Firefox 4 beta. No difference. Meh.

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

2010-09-14T02:01:00.000-07:00

Frankly, I don't think anyone could be so friendly to a person who he/she met for only one day. Nobody.

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

2010-09-11T07:59:00.000-07:00

Who? My boyfriend.
When? Last week.
Where? Boyfriend's house.
What? Not to quarrel over small issues again.

And why? Because I'm a selfish bitch who thinks I'm always right. I need to discipline myself, and be humble. Then my darling will love me more!! No quarrels! Everytime after a quarrel, eith one of us will give each other surprise. He gave me 2 boxes of granola bars last week. To repay him, I've got a little surprise for him tomorrow! Heheh..

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

2010-09-10T06:56:00.000-07:00

My parents.

I know I should be talking about a person, but I can't make up my mind who is really the one who is going through the "worst of times". There have been some issues about them which have yet to be solved & I know some of them are just swept under the rug, we pretend the problems are over, but I know they're still there. And both my parents are having a hard time dealing with it.

It pains me to see either one of them so hurt. </3

Btw, it's my father's birthday today. I gave him an organiser with our (3 daughters) photo inside so that when he travels abroad, we travel with him. Not physically but yeah, you know what I mean. My dad's a lonely man. & I'm his kickass daughter who's so damn filial to my parents! Love me.

Stalking expresses obsession.

2010-09-09T08:52:00.000-07:00

Okay, UT3 started and it wasn't as bad as it seemed. Thank God I didn't spend my whole day mugging like the others just to utilise this one-time-only knowledge for a mere 90 minute test. -.-

It a waste of time and space, my brain capacity is that limited.

Cognitive, OB & Comms was okay. Mad easy. I'd say it's a definite pass for me. But I was late for OB UT3. ): It's okay. I finished the test anyway. Science today. Can you believe I actually dozed off during the test?! Seriously, there's chemistry and it's all foreign to me. I don't even know how to start on the damn answer! Oh well, met Michelle after our test and we went to Bugis together. Saw Wenhao on the train too. Walau, why everybody on Thursday can book out but my boyfriend cannot? Sad.

Anyway, I have bits and pieces of photos I've yet to upload.

Random camwhoring. I think I look cuter with my hair tied up. LOL, BHB!My shopping loots greeted me in my mailbox! Happy girl :DBen & Jerry is my boyfriend naoooo. A cookie affair! Papa bought it for me!

I TELL YOU DON'T LAUGH HOR!

2010-09-08T08:17:00.000-07:00

I was bored during Comms UT3, I did this. *smacks forehead* Why am I so lame??Science tomorrow. I'm prepared to fail.

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

2010-09-07T10:02:00.000-07:00

I hesitated about writing this entry because I couldn't decide which is the favourite among all my memories which I've accumulated over 18 years. But if there's one, it would be the most recent favourite memory that is still etched in my mind.

That would be the first time holding hands with my darlingggggg!

Okay, so you know that we got together briefly after we known each other, so it's quite uncomfortable for us to hold hands and such. If I remembered correctly, it was only the first few days of our relationship, we were on the escalator, with his friends bedind us, and they loudly whispered "hold her hand! hold her hand!" Lol. It's was damn loud and clear for a whisper lor. But he still never hold. ):

Then while we were at 213, I was sitting, like this;Of couse my pose not so glam la, we were at the basketball court shelter ehhh. But you get what I mean la, I was sitting with my arms supporting me. I was minding my own business when Vincent's hand slowly inched toward mine wor!! I could see it from the corner of my eyes. Heheh. He then took my hand and held it for a few seconds before bringing my hand to place it on his lap, still holding my hand! Aww, so sweet. Then when his friends came back from playing basketball they all were like "eh, eh, eh~" *raise eyebrows* LOL. *blush blush*.

I think by the end of the day I was already clinging onto his arms already. HAHAHA. Love love.

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

2010-09-05T08:57:00.000-07:00

VINCENT CHENG.

Like duhhhhh~

We had a tiff yesterday & I purposely put the photo of me & Amir as my facebook's profile photo to spite him. I think I said a lot of nonsense to him when we quarrelled. I told him to fuck another girl. LOL. It was stupid. So anyway, I went to his house early today. I spam call his phone like 50 over times because he didn't pick up my calls. From Tampines call him until I reach Yishun, still never pick up. Even when I reach his doorstep also never pick up. Ugh. I had to wait outside his house like a fugitive while I play with my laptop. Not the first time it happen already okay!!

End up he went to Northpoint and only saw me sitting outside his house like some asshole when he came back home. Walau, I also want to go there one leh. Never tell me. :/

Watched Shin Chan anime at his house. Before heading off for dinner with his father.

One last kiss. And then he's off to camp. ):

BUT HE'S GONNA FETCH ME FROM SCHOOL NEXT MONDAY! :D

I feel rich.

2010-09-04T10:40:00.000-07:00

My perfect Saturday. I shall not ruin it by thinking of you. My heart hurts.

Cabbed to church today. I was early!! (: Dinner at Tampines Mall after service. I finally purchased 2 tops online and I'm waiting for them to arrive in my mailbox! I seriously need to buy clothes for next semester because 3/4 of my wardrobe is inappropriate for my course. :/

UT3 is this coming Monday! Need to start studying already. I'm dreading this. Ughhhhhhh~

Midnight Junkie

2010-09-03T21:24:00.000-07:00

Webcam.Made my own supper out of peanut butter and cornflakes. Very unhealthy to the max, but I WAS HUNGRY. I don't really like peanut butter though, I prefer nutella! I remember I made nutella + banana sandwich before! But I think I didn't slice the banana thin enough. :/

1. 3 slices of bread. I know I should have taken 2 instead of 3.
2. Spreading the creamy think peanut butter
3. Cornflakes!
4. Bread, penut butter, cornflakes, bread!
5. Me no like bread crust. Bleh.
6. Takes a bite. *crunch crunch.

Oh, my dad just got home from overseas, don't know where he went, too lazy to keep track also. He brought pocari sweat sachets for me! It's an isotonic drink that tastes like 100 plus or H2O. Best thing is, I can drink it cold!!

1,2,3,4,: I ♥ pocari sweat.

I SHALL GO MAKE ANOTHER ONE NOW! :D

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

2010-09-03T12:07:00.000-07:00

Dear M,

Everyone likes second chances, but I don't think you deserve one. Just die, please. Your existence makes me sick.

Love The Way You Lie

2010-09-02T11:07:00.000-07:00

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

2010-09-02T10:42:00.000-07:00

I know judging someone by their first impression is bad. But I can't help it. His hair = bird nest.

Oh, try typing "shrek" in the search box (right sidebar). I was blogging about him.

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

2010-09-01T00:50:00.000-07:00

I've only had one heartbreak in my whole life because I've only had one serious (ex) relationship. The one that broke my heart the hardest? I'm sure you can guess who he was. LH.

After our breakup, I did some really really crazy things, some I won't mention because it's really personal. Oh, we threw paper balls at the girl you're sitting with. HAHAHA, bitch. & I got myself a new piercing! But I cried for days after our relationship ended. Seeing him in school after our breakup was like putting my heart in a stone motar and him using a pestle to crush my already crystallized heart. ): But it's okay, I've got a better boyfriend now. *pokes Vincent*

I remember you said this to me.

做人要拿得起，放得下。

I have so many things to say to you, it makes it impossible to write at your wall.

2010-08-30T14:28:00.000-07:00

Dear darling/baobei/sunshine/boyfriend/asshole/eh/handsome/sweetheart/love/laogong/qing ai de,

I was lying on the bed thinking about you, again. And I realised that we've never been friends before. I mean, you were my friend's boyfriend's friend. That's how I got to know you. And you got my number through Eunice! (HAHA, cute.) Ohohoh, remember the very first time we went out together with your friends? You were so shy, you didn't even look at me, and I still remember I had to rush home to do my POA homework after a classmate called. Yeah, stupid first impression I gave you. Then we went out again to Far East, then to Pasir Ris park, and that night, you asked me to be your girlfriend! Aww, so sweet! But then hor, you told Eunice that you felt very pekchek whenever you sms me right? Cos I always send 1 word replies. Lol. Then like 2 days after we got together, I ton with you and your friends at Woodlands. And then like few weeks into our relationship, I wanted to break up with you because of LH then I came to 213 alone, and I cried like some pussy like that. Eh, first time I cry infront of you leh. But in the end we nvr break up la. Oh talking about 213, do you still remember how you first held my hands?!?! I always remind you of that so that I can see you shy shy. Haha. There were times when I was unfaithful to you, I still remember your fucked up friend hollering "betrayer" in the background while you were on the phone with me. Darling, I'm glad you chose to forgive and stay with me despite all your friends' objection. Yeah, I was a bitch and they didn't like what I was doing to you. I'm really sorrie. Then you brought me to meet your family. At first I was quite apprehensive to the idea because I was afraid that they don't like me. Even up till now, I still ask you if your father/sisters got complain anything about me or not. I spend too much time in your house, your father has to pay for an additional person when we go out and eat, your family has to accomadate to my food selection, and I take up majority of the bed space. Actually it's because I keep hugging you so every inch you move, I will snuggle towards you, then you'll be falling off the bed. Hehe. I like the way you sleep. You snore! Really! I used to hate it when you're sleeping, I remember the days when you would sleep for hours when I came to your house and we will quarrel about this matter. But I can see the changes now, you don't sleep when I'm around. Now that you're in NS, I keep spamming your wall like nobody's business. If you're his friend, you can see a page full of my shit. I'm trying to reduce my wall posts. I scared I kena blocked. Really eh. Will get blocked one lor. Which crazy girl would write at someone's wall like 100 times a day? ME. Tsk tsk. Why liddat? You said that ever since I joined CHCC ministry, I've been singing children songs to you just to irritate you. I can't sing and my voice is horrible, but I still sing to you. Annoying bitch. Whenever I sing, you come and tickle me. There's so many things I like about you. Even though we're never been friends before, when we first started out, our relationship was very rocky. But now, I feel like I'm very open to you. I can show you my armpits and ask you whether you can see my armpit hairs or not. LOL. Shhh... I said I'm going to propose to you on 29th Feb if you don't propose to me. See, I'm so tiong xim to you wor! When I become your wife, I'll cook for you k? I can only cook vegetables because I don't want to touch raw meat and don't think about fish either. If there's like, instant meat or something, then you'll be eating plenty of that. I'll make the best wife of the century! Muahahaha. You're proud of me right? Okay la, you say I think too much, I really think I think too much. But you know what? You're the best boyfriend! Okay, since I said you're the best boyfriend, next week must buy chocolates for me k? I got my period now, so I must abstain from chocolates but you know how much I love chocolates, I'll die within the next 72 hours if there's no chocolate in me. Remember to bring pocari sweat for me when you book out leyyy. Omg, I'm talking about food now, I should stop. And I really need to sleep. Well, Bb, that's about what I wanted to say to you. Pretty crazy right? I know you'll take maybe half an hour to read this chunk? Hehe.

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

2010-08-30T13:23:00.000-07:00

You. W.

How should I describe you? You're good for the bad and bad for the good. I can't decide which one I am either.

You're just like poison
Slowly moving through my system
Breaking all of my defenses with time
You're just like poison and i just don't get it
How can something so deadly feel so right

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

2010-08-30T01:53:00.000-07:00

Terri & Merrill's SOT graduation with Sunday service 4-6 teachers & Gabby. Spot me.

Went to serve yesterday morning. Oh, the person I wish I could be? Someone closer to children. Yes, I'm one step closer to that wish because of my ministry. Happy teacher's day.

I'm in pain. );

Something about you.

2010-08-27T14:37:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I think I look dorky with glasses. O_O

I'm up at 5.11am because I don't want to oversleep and end up being late meeting Vincent later. I'm going to Choa Chu Kang (for the first time) to fetch my boyfriend from camp. He was supposed to book out yesterday afternoon, but he had guard duty that night, life sucks sometimes.

So anyway, I didn't sleep last night too because I was watching 9 episodes of Glee online and this "Other Asian" is shoooo handsome! Ya, he's not the main cast but he is not a calefare either! Haha, it seems ironic because in this Asian country, I prefer the minority who are ang mohs, but I like the Asian in this American series. I'm so contradictory, it kills. It's quite heartbreaking to see the cheerleading coach calling him "Other Asian" because she doesn't know his name.I think Sharlotte might take a second look at him, he has single eyelids. HAHAHAHA. Nooooo, she like Mexicans now. LOL.

Oh, you know what? I tried to study for OB just now and I realised that out of all the problems we've covered, I only know P11. The sources and contingencies of powers. I think complacency is seriously wrecking me. Sigh.

I need to pee.